Massive applause and laughter greeted a fabulously improvised song, At Your Local Gift Shop Store, specially written and performed for last Thursday’s Greats Awards by comedian, songwriter and improviser Pippa Evans.
Slightly adapted, but in Pippa’s own words:
“You know that awful feeling when you’ve forgotten your mum’s birthday?
You technically didn’t forget – you didn’t remember it right away.
Oh my God I’ve got 10 minutes. What am I giong to do?
Well, we all know what’s going on for you.
Get down to your local gift shop. Open up the door.
They’ll have trinkets and rings and lots of shiny things at your local gift shop store.
Welcome to your local gift shop. They’ll have what you need and so much more.
Pillows filled with lavender. Tea towels of Pat Boon. Cards with Happy Birthday and ‘oh he died too soon’.
Plush toys, with eyes the size of the moon, that follow you around the room.
At your local gift shop store.
And if you want a candle, they’ll have a few in stock. From classics like vanilla to more popular Butcher’s Block.
They’ve got ones that smell of fire, so that’s fire that smells like fire.
Don’t like fire, here’s a trick. Buy a reed diffusion stick
at your local gift shop store!
A now a little word for our favourite customer. The one who says ‘just looking’. Thanks a lot!
The niggle it does arouse when they say ‘just here to browse’.
Well, I’d like to knock you out with this novely flower pot!
Oh, if you ask me if I could just put some wrapping on, just don’t compare me to Rowan Atkinson. (You know, that really funny bit in Love Actually?).
Jewellery shaped like hearts and cats, heart shaped cats and cats with hearts; flamingo pens, Biro hens and cheeky chocolate private parts.
Fairy lights, novelty tights, boxing grannies made of plastic lights.
Something for great grandad, or a child you didn’t know you had.
Just open the door at your local gift shop, private pitstop, local gift shop store!
The internet you’re OK, but gift shops, you’re here to stay
Local gift shop store!
Top: The fantastic comedian Pippa Evans performing At Your Local Gift Shop Store last Thursday (May 17) at The Greats Awards.
